Bonus Aficionado Gifts

"He can't speak to you at the moment - he's bonding with his compensation package."

'We have 800 beers on tap. If you want to hear all of them, you'll have to get here earlier, we close in six hours.'

'As our new company logo, I'm not quite sure it's sending out the right message.'

'If only every year was an election year.'

Back to school.

'Let me see your portfolio of stolen ideas.'

'Have you been 'helping the environment by supporting local produce' again?'

Beer Stall

'Which sounds better: 'now with MORE XZ100' or 'now with LESS XZ100'?'

'And if you can't find the microbrew you're looking for here, you might want to try our other store: Microbrews C to E.'

"I'm seeing some dominance issues."

Man with 'Real Ale' written on t-shirt, woman with 'Real Pine' written on rolling pin

Happy thoughts

"We need to sue, claiming free speech is being violated by remotes with fast forward buttons."

Joyce could certainly handle her drink!

DVD extras - the making of the boxed set.

'Just sitting around letting advertisers brainwash me. What about you?'

'It's creative as hell! Now that you've got that out of your system, give me a campaign that will sell.'

Roads with a view.

'Malty tasking.'

"Ah yes, I know this bit...it's from the advert!"

They get into debt so fast these days...

"The problem is that our ads have either been too Jewish or not Jewish enough."

"We're looking for the kind of bad taste that will grab - but not appall."

Casino. Keno. $$$. Win. Cashier. He sure wins a lot! He's "Keno Savvy."

Copywriter's blank paper compared to the gridded screen of a content provider.

"Where do you see yourself in five pints time?"

"That's 'Help' with an 'H'."

You can't fool all of the people all of the time, especially with our advertising budget.

"And the award for Best Product Placement in a Domestic or Foreign Film goes to..."

'It's a demonstration by retired CEOs who refuse to give up their bonuses.'

'The client loves your work. Cut everything except for their logo.'

'We now have 28 subscription cards in every issue, but we MUST HAVE MORE!'

The Acme Agency: "Dedicated to Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Media Exposure."

Great Poets of Catalogdom