Body Art Critic Gifts

NON-TATTOOED Wonder

'I'll be darned! A nipple mood ring!'

'Ouwth! Bid my tong!'

'Maybe a helium boob job wasn't such a good idea,babe!'

"I got tired of wearing a hat."

"Kids these days and their piercings..."

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Tattoos sagging with time

Customer to skin artist: 'Can I just get a tattoo of a body piercing?'

"Me, a footballer. . ?"

'Of course I'm depressed. I've run out of places to pierce.'

Maternity tattoos

'Will the surgery leave a scar?'

The Girl With The Draggin' tattoo: 'Hot...Cold.'

'He's got your tattoos.'

'It's not that I don't want more kids Victoria, I'm worried I won't have enough skin for their names.'

Snowman Tattoo

"You're sure it's a birthmark?"

'Sorry, but I think your Mondrian tattoo was a mistake.'

Devil tattoo.

"Your tattoo doesn't make you look scary. It's a cute little floppy eared bunny."

Tattoo and Piercing...Stares by an angry, judgmental mother.

'I hope you don't mind, dear — I got my ears pierced.'

Young woman shows off her tattoos.

The Coffee Tattoo

'Makeup? This is a tattoo.'

Come and See the Untattooed Thin Lady.

"... And precisely how long have you been reading underground comix?"

'Now don't complain Mum: You started it by giving me my first nose-ring...'

'I finally got my pouch pierced.'

Operation Tattoo

Monk with a smiley face on his tonsure.

Made It! Without getting one tattoo.

An old lady has her varicose veins tattooed to look like plants

"Yeah, I want a neck tat with gothic lettering that says, 'Welcome to a career in the fast food service industry.'"