Boardroom Counsellor Gifts

"I'm sorry, Harrigan, But a man's gotta do what a man's accountant says he's gotta do."

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

'Now that I have your attention...'

"Miracles happen, gentlemen, but they don't come cheap."

'It's a chart of office morale. This is where you went on vacation.'

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

'You've got bats alright...now we'll just have to determine what kind.'

The secret of living happily ever after....Do it alone.

"Remember...when the going gets tough...DELEGATE!"

'The sunglasses idea would have worked if you hadn't started snoring.'

'Ok, here's the meeting agenda ... it's gonna be a long one.'

"Better than a business model, I have a business scheme."

'So do you want me to minute that George is dying of boredom and Nigel will rip my head off if I don't stop boring him with my blather?'

Couples' therapy

"Listen to everybody's opinions? Please, we're not that desperate."

"Tell the vice presidents they've downsized enough."

"Some advice please...How do I squeeze 9 days work into 5 and still see my family?"

"They've agreed to the merger, the sticking point is who is swallowing who?"

'How did the 'I want you all to take a pay cut or leave' strategy go down?'

'I have been hearing some disturbing comments about you, Parker, some of your employees think you're a nice guy!'

'Our job will be to drag the competition down to our level.'

'It's my company, I'll decide whether I want to go to the partner's meeting or not.'

'Ladies and gents, the executive-worker pay ratio is not what it used to be!'

Business Admin - Group Think 101.

"You can't possibly know how I feel. Everybody likes you."

'Uh - oh... this looks like an unfriendly takeover!'

'Simply put, we are on our ninth life!'

Takeovers.

Pin the blame on the donkey.

'Why can't they call it a deer, or a squirrel market?'

'As I see it, our choices are 'no' and 'hell no'.'

'Anyone who opposes the plan I'm about to propose please signify by saying 'I resign.''

'Something tells me this is going to be a long meeting.'

'Remember - Reilly's Chairman of the Board, but Henderson's the Alpha male.'

"Well, there's nowhere to go but up."