Blondie Fanatic Pillows

"I'm 65, Mom - I'll play my Blondie records as loud as I want!"

"This is nice … let’s not hop again tomorrow."

Anthropologists discover the earliest known depiction of Jazz Hands.

'Wait! That's not one of your novelty slippers...that's the cat!'

This is Giselle, our bichon frise, and Fred, our legacy pet.""This is Giselle, our bichon frise, and Fred, our legacy pet."

"Everybody on the bus today was played by Anthony Hopkins."

"She's a golden retriever...I've always had a thing for blondes!"

Do you like my bling?

"Now that we've fermented coconut milk, do we build a boat or a tiki bar?"

Prosecco Drinker

Hedgehog/Punk Romance

'Who came up with this 'family planning' idea, anyway?'

"Dude. You need to get cable."

"Although a face transplant is theoretically possible you still can't have Brad Pitt's."

Bad Hair Day

"If we hadn't met, would you still be producing fringe theatre?"

'Can you tell me the nationality of Napoleon?'

Squirrel Salon

"Before I run several extensive eye exams on him for poor vision, have you thought about cutting his hair?"

'...So it's an orange orange Roughy smoothie?'

Photographs of Neville gave gals an itch they found difficult to scratch.

"I'm updating my relationship status to, complicated."

"Terrific! A hit! Broadway at its best!"

Ron Perlman

I Love Baldies.

Celebrity Accountant

Women weighing herself with balloons.

BEZ.