Blonde Beauty Enthusiast Pillows

'This is Cindy Larrabee, substituting for Alicia Bemis, who turned out to be not quite blonde enough....'

Bad hair day!

"I wish I had her jewelry." "I wish I had his wife." "I wish I had her figure." "I wish I had his money."

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

"Whoa. Jeff. Looks like you got that job at the cosmetic testing lab."

Dating is so expensive...

Pampered and poodled.

'Be ready in a minute - just have to put on my face.'

For heavens sake,put some make-up on!

Could you see anything in her? I certainly couldn't! (Man's eyes are popping out of his head).

'Wrinkles can't breathe in mud.'

'I ask her to make up her mind. So she powders her forehead.'

What price beauty?

"I don't like your application."

"That product you are using is fantastic. Your eye bags are gone."

Why weren't we born rich instead of beautiful?

"Who's a pretty girl now?"

'I'm not begging, I've just painted my claws.'

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

"Hair spray"

'I washed the gray right out of my hair, but now I can't get the gray out of my tub.'

It was time for a little bit of lady admin

New Twenty Blades

Beauty salon - Our hair color is to dye for!

Your presentation will be terrific. I was up all night, but something's still missing. Here. I've got just what you need. How thoughtful! Eye concealer! No need to thank me.

Become a Cosmetic Surgeon - Raise a Few Eyebrows!

"I'm not trying to be beautiful, I'm only trying to look better than everyone else there."

"Remember when we were Instagram models?"

Cosmetics. Helps get rid of crow's feet.

'I'm still hot. It just comes in flashes now.'

"We're the same age, but you look great! What's your secret?"

'Here's my fail proof way to restore a youthful appearance - a 30 watt bulb.'

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall, go to hell."

"We're having a make up test at school. Can I borrow your mascara?"

'This is a very powerful perfume -- there's a ten-day waiting period.'