Blazer Aficionado Pillows

Bertie Wooster type teaching a parrot to talk

A daily rubdown with a beard brush will wrangle awkward bristles and train them downwards...

Apart from protest footage I forget what downtown looks like.

wattle covers

The Beard in the Stone

'Don't worry about getting lost, folks. These trails are all well marked. . . if I do say so myself.'

General Meade's Army, Near Culpepper - Shaving in Camp

'Long shift?'

Sigh … They grow up so fast, don't they?

"You'll have to forgive Roland. He still uses 'stomach' and 'abdominals' interchangeably."

"You're fortunate. Stubble looks really good on you."

'You called me out of the blue... Cobalt, ultramarine, prussian, cerulean or phthalocyanine?'

T-Shirt reads: 'Out of mind, I won't be back.'

A stylized man in pyjamas

Man with long beard looks at centerfold in Beard Monthly magazine.

Trendies, INC

Clock Tower Shadow

Unlike modern day hipsters, pre-historic hipsters didn't need to rely on yoga, hiking or even rock climbing to stay fit...

Blue Blazer Cocktail.

Honore de Balzac

'Since I got this exercise ball, my abs have gotten into the best shape they've ever been!'

Military General with numerals medals and uniform decorations with 'cont. on back' sign.

Man with fake beard gets a package from the Beard of the Month club.

Peace and Justice Return to the Joint High Commission

"This time it's curtains for you, Black Bart!"

Beard Wig

'I must admit, I do look good in stripes.'

'Darlin', what's an adjective for a two-timin', heart-breakin' outlaw that rhymes with iPod?'

"Watch yourself, stranger. I've got an itchy trigger finger."

Man Reaches For The Puree Button On The Elevator

'OK. Sometimes, after games, when I'm all alone? I... I like to dress up in a NBA uniform.'

"It's actually an ink stain but my wife has grown quite fond of it."

'Will a six pack protect you against market fluctuations?'

"Believe me, nobody's going to care you had facial hair a hundred million years from today."

"I just had these linen scrubs dry-cleaned!"