Birdspotting Gifts

Ornithologist: 'I don't do teeth, I tell you! I do birds!'

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

A Symphony of Penguins

Polly txt speak

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

'The proliferation of bird watchers make me more and more self-conscious...'

Children's Parties

"They must be grown-up ducks, because they're eating the crusts too."

Life is for the birds.

A baby duck in a tiny car seat on the mother duck's back.

"What's that? I asked for a teal lichen. That's a brown thread. Are you trying to upset me?"

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"Finches, don't look now, but there's a creepy guy staring at our beaks."

'A burp or a fart, I can excuse, but throwing up a pellet of fur and bones? That's gross dude!'

"When is my next parole hearing?"

"You've been so good to us all these years. Is there anything we can do to repay you?"

"Do me next."

Bird feeding chick that is nesting in a knight's helmet

"Oooh... Look, honey. Scarlet macaws! You know, they mate for life." "That's what you think."

"The fish sticks here are very good."

"Any idea how long your family might be visiting?"

"God, I hope no one asks me to sing."

"Honey, you're spoiling that child."

Intelligent people laugh too!

A newborn parachutes to safety after the stork carrying him gets hit by a plane.

"Now they're referring to us as ecology nuts."

Cat in a tank...

"He could have been the national bird, but that was a long, long time ago."

Papageno from The Magic Flute

Polluted geese

"We just haven't been flapping them hard enough."

Sign in tree from bird "next appearance 3:00 pm"

'Bob, I know you're a Mockingbird, but a few compliments every now and then would greatly help your marriage...'

"This has nothing to do with you ... this is between us and the tree."

"Sure my wings flap 70 times per second-- I've been sipping nectar all day."