Bird Watcher Humorist Pillows

'He's been binge drinking again.'

"Honey, you're spoiling that child."

'According to the weight chart, if you were a condor, you'd have a wingspan of 97 feet.'

''What's in the bag, lady?''

"Sometimes, plastic in the ocean isn't bad... Ooh, that bottle cap will make a lovely bowl for Ed and Nicole!"

I think it's time he left home.'

Cuckoo has got halfway through it's call and then had an arrow shot at it.

New York Scatological Society

"We can do this the easy way or the Hitchcockian way."

"At the time I thought it was a goose."

Tom, you may not want to pause so long at the top of your swing.

"I'm the bluebird of PMS. Fetch me some decaf and turn on the air conditioner. I'm burning up in here!"

"Can we not fly in a "V"? Victor broke up with me."

"My landing gear won't come down. I have a cramp."

"Now, son, hitting a car is all about timing. You'll want to release about here..."

Signs reads 'Do Not Feed the Boids.'

A couple of birds out on the town.

"I don't know what happened - he was such a good egg."

'Hup, two, three, four! Hup, two, three, four!'

'Sure I can do same day service.'

"Stop serving Table 3 complimentary bread."

"He's a bird-dog."

Artist Hazards

'Why can't I ever lead?'

'Dude, I think you should cut back on the Gummi worms.'

Two ducks in restaurant, one without a beak, "Can I get my bill, please?"

"We only have three and twenty black birds for the pie."

"For goodness sake, Wilf, trim your eyebrows -- they think you're one of them!"

Once Henry saw that his usual 'Mating Dance' moves weren't working, he decided to go 'Gangnam Style.'

CEO and COO.

Self examination.

"It's a thongbird."

'Hey guys, wouldn't it be alot easier if we just wore layers?'

'Will you get your mind out of the gutter!'