Bird Owner Gifts

'You won't last ten minutes out there.'

'It's true what they say about the early bird,Mrs.Wagstaff-she's got worms!'

A Carrot: 'Who's a pretty farmer then?'

LOST AND FOUND, 'Maybe he flew south.'

'She lithpth!'

"He doesn't talk much but he does some amazing impressions."

'The proliferation of bird watchers make me more and more self-conscious...'

"What's that? I asked for a teal lichen. That's a brown thread. Are you trying to upset me?"

"Finches, don't look now, but there's a creepy guy staring at our beaks."

'A burp or a fart, I can excuse, but throwing up a pellet of fur and bones? That's gross dude!'

"When is my next parole hearing?"

"You've been so good to us all these years. Is there anything we can do to repay you?"

"God, I hope no one asks me to sing."

"Now they're referring to us as ecology nuts."

Polluted geese

Papageno from The Magic Flute

"He could have been the national bird, but that was a long, long time ago."

'Since I'm new here, let's start by clearning the air. You may have noticed that I'm short for a C.E.O. . .'

Sign in tree from bird "next appearance 3:00 pm"

'You know too much!'

"This has nothing to do with you ... this is between us and the tree."

They try, but those crows can't make noises they used to. The lost caws!

Knight feeding his kids.

'And when did you have your last owl movement?'

"Trust me, you're not ready!"

"Just kick back and enjoy this. These are the nest years of our lives!"

Pigeon Little

'I know that bird feeder is guaranteed to be squirrel-proof, but I still think they are getting in there.'

How about going easy on the carbs

So you're a mocking bird...

'Son, it's time we had that little talk about ornithology and entomology.'

'What was that?!' 'A 'Mach'-ing bird.'

Wanted For Bird Watching: Reward

"Mating dance? Good luck with that. I couldn't even get my husband to do the chicken dance at our wedding."

'Will you please stop feeding the pigeons?!'