Biotech Entrepreneur Gifts

'Sequencing? No, this baby tells us how much we can charge for genome data.'

"Welcome to the future"

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

"Actually, she's just a figurehead boss. Our real CEO is an algorithm floating around somewhere in the cloud!"

"When I grow up, I'm writing the Great American App."

"There's your son's heartbeat, and over here is the app he's developing."

'Can our software do that?'

"So, what does everyone think of XX81's suggestion for increased funding into AI research?"

US v.s. Tech Giants

A day at the transgenic races

'How's the gene-splicing going? Cloned any new hepatitis antibodies?'

"What's a nine-letter word for biotechnology?"

Medicinal plants

"Of course, if they ever start to suspect all their TVs are watching them back, we may have problems."

"I wrote this one after my third startup failed. It’s called ‘I Got Yer App Right Here.’"

"Boss... I just read an article about trans-humanism. Apparently, sometime in the next 50 years, it will become possible to live forever."

"Give my compliments to the Biotech industry"

"Gentlemen, may I present our company's future. A buggy whip... with Bluetooth!"

Bio, Inc. Should we continue to invest in this promising new cloning technique? Yeah, let's double down on it.

You invested in Facebook?! How could you? That bugs you? You, of all people, are mad that the FTC is suing Meta Platforms in an antitrust case? No, I mean how can you afford to invest? If you can afford to buy stock, then I pay you way too much. It was only $40! Quiet, I'm calculating your pay cut.

Recombinant DNA Lab. I'm crossing a pine tree, pumpkin and bunny --- You can use it for three holidays!

Bio Lab. You spliced phoenix DNA into a lemming? What are you trying to make? A perpetual motion machine!

If at first you don't succeed call it version 1.0

"Hey, this anti-depressant you've come up with really works"

'The 'Business Man's Lunch?' The chicken salad comes served in a laptop.'

"Our cloud computing services include IaaS, PaaS, SaaS, NaaS, CaaS...and BaaS!"

'Mr. 'You can't be too over-weighted in tech stocks', meet Mr. 'You can't be too over-weighted in bio-tech'.'

"Social media stocks have taken a beating I'm seeing a lot of avatars on ledges."

Bio Fuels.

Smith and Hobson: People replacing people with apps and robots since 2009.

Warning! Stay off the biotech lawn.

Recombinant DNA Lab. To-da! The palindromedary!

Cuba vaccines against Covid

"The Bluetooth Special comes with a side order of Wi-Fi."

Taken genetic engineering too far