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As a louder and more satisfying alternative to clapping, Lily uses her bingo wings.

"House!" (train spotter calling out like bingo winner).

"I was unfaithful once with a bald headed man behind a bingo hall." "That was me, Flo."

Forty days without a bingo, Mrs. Franklin finally snaps.

"Look at that brand-new building! I hear it has a cafeteria, a lounge and valet parking! I have to go!"

"He has a great voice for giving sermons but even greater for calling Bingo ... "

"Ruby, it's uncanny how you've trained your 'mascot' to sniff out players who are close to getting Bingo!"

"How about the circus, Ruby? Does the circus take your mind off Bingo?!"

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

"We don't call them 'horns' anymore. They're interactive audio crash deterrent stimulators."

'How about a game of cards?'

Bingo night.

"You are still here."

'He wrote a whole book on how to play a slot machine. I'm anxious for his next one: How to Set an Alarm Clock.'

Bingo! Credit card number!! The real reason raccoons like garbage.

'OK Mr and Mrs Johnson let's spin the wheel and find you a child!'

Existential Risk

'This may be an old computer, but it won the March Madness office pool again and wants the money deposited in its Swiss bank account.'

"Oh, I almost forgot: This time, if you have a good hand, don’t say, 'Meowee!'"

Let the Summer Games Begin!

Destination casinos...

Irritable Vowel Syndrome

White Flight. Beautification. Gentrification. Plain Old Rich.

Battleship Bingo Night.

"In light of current market conditions, I've diversified your portfolio to include Lotto tickets and bingo chips."

'Talk about lack of trust! My trainer didn't even bet on me, but I showed him: I won the race!'

"Who the hell didn't rewind Jumanji 20 years ago?!?"

"He's in a high stake poker game right now."

'I've only got two numbers to go on the bingo!'

'Remember, guys... we've got to clean up this mess before the folks get home.'

"I expected it to be a lot busier on our opening night."

A tortoise walks away from a poker game, having lost its shell.

"Holy smokes, he's undefeatable!"

The Trump Administration Alternative Reality Game

"Norm hadn't won his Zoom Bingo in awhile, but scored something even better, a grocery delivery time slot."