Bill Jester Gifts

"The first bill is always a shock-everyone thinks Heaven will be free."

We should take a break. Ron's eyes have turned into spinning rainbow wheels.

Employee won't think about work outside of box

"We're following Carrot Top."

"Hello? Speaking, not listening."

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

"The desktop skills test was a little worrying,56% couldn't manage 'Word' 75% were confused by 'Excel' and 43% wanted to know what channel 'Eastenders' was on."

"We need to change, but WHEN?"

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

"It's confusing when everybody has a pointer."

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

"You work too hard. You have stress balls!"

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

"Before I read the financial report I have to ask... do any of you have a weapon?"

Team Experiences Cabinet: Productivity, Fun, Goal Setting!

Dog fetching clown shoes.

'Why don't you try seeing it from your point of view?'

"Not guilty but prepared to settle out of court, your honour."

Supreme Court. It's either constitutional or unconstitutional - We don't use a scale of one to ten!

'Stay with me now, people, because in Step C, things get a bit delicate.'

"Now this chart should clear up any confusion you have with the report."

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

'I bet you think I'm drinking tea...'

"Well, if you hadn't misfiled it in the first place it wouldn't have been lost."

'Tesco's cheif executive meets with staff.'

"Let me now direct your attention to the pepperoni."

'This court finds you guilty Mr. Jones. As your punishment, the bailiff here will slug you one.'

'Brains...brains...brains...'

'You've become like a son to me, Alvin. But the company has strict rules against nepotism, so I have to let you go.'

Paper Profits Break Glass In Case of Emergency.

'Can I sue someone because I didn't win my lawsuit?'

"It's not bulls**t if we call it strategy."

Stepping on clown's shoe...

"I was just finishing up some spring cleaning."

'Your Honor, in order to avoid being sued, we find the defendant 'Not guilty.''