Bill Analyzer Gifts

'We've had our new simplified gas bill!'

'So far, all I can tell you for sure is how much I've charged you.'

Stephen King's latest horror novel: 'Healthcare reform debate'

Consortia set to take over

'Hello, Doc Barnes? I just got your bill. You've just bought yourself a cow.'

"He's refusing to pay the inflationary bits"

'I wish you'd put the heater back on Frank! Even the wall ducks have gone somewhere warmer!'

'On jobless...on foreclosed...on worry and insomniac!'

'Poor me. . . pour me a drink!'

"Warren serves as my aggregator."

Business restraining law firms

'No, it wasn't a horror movie, It was the gas bill'

"Alrighty, let's work out that copay."

"Oh for goodness' sake, Brian. As if our gas bill wasn't high enough already!"

"Please tell me it's a local call..."

"Just sign here, sir - it clears me of any responsibility."

'Sorry. In the time it took you to get out your credit card the price of smokes went up another 30 cents.'

New contract favours 'business-savvy' GPs.

TASERS...With the cost of electricity we could only afford 50 volts.

Thames Water bills rocket.

"Honey, have you seen the size of this phone bill?"

'They've redesigned the gas bill to make it clearer and easier to understand!'

"The phrase 'expect the unexpected' must have originated with someone trying to decipher their cell phone bill."

'I understand the fee for medications. But how come I was also billed for side effects.'

Energy Privatisation

Caution! Peak power and electric bill shock possible.

"Our gas bill's been levelled up."

UK budget 2021.

'Give it to me straight, Doc. How many billable hours do I have left?'

"That $36 is for the wrong number you dialed. It belongs to a lawyer."

'Is this for wiping greasy hands? No, it's your itemized bill.'

"He's something new. Our phone bill now has a monthly stub perforation fee."

School Budget Cuts

"Is there a doctor in the house...preferably in-network?"

Financial Advisor. How would you describe your income and outgo? Instant conversion.