Big Tech Gifts

Twitter censorship

'This time we're going to do things right. And if that doesn't work, we'll just go back to stealing.'

"The data looks good, sir, but the vibes are mucho heavioso."

'It's one of these new phones that takes photographs.'

'I try not to think big too often or I get terrible headaches.'

"I don't think our smart home likes the color we painted it. It keeps spitting it out."

"'What I wanted to do, but could not, during my socially-distanced summer vacation this year'..."

"I learned how to shop online, mommy. If you see a series of tractor trailers arrive, it's just the rest of the stuff I ordered."

"The results are impressive, but it'll be decades before we can transmit and receive pornography."

You Are Now Entering Texas Think Big

"First Big Oil, the Big Steel, and now, Big Cookie."

"Perhaps it was too soon for a self-driving wheel."

'Here comes Mr. 'Smarter-then-you'.'

"And once we wipe out the disease, where does that leave us?"

The secret thoughts of smart machines.

Emperor Trump gives a thumbs down to a polar bear

'These are our projected profits as capitalism self-destructs.'

"Give us a chip."

"Finally, a co-worker who CAN handle Big data!"

'I can't wait to get the money for one of those new laptops, this foot-top is killing my back!'

'Crusher' Collins: Data custodian by day, data bouncer by night.

"Hawaii Five-O" is back? Yeah, but they should call it "Hawaii Version Two Point-0."

Facebook in Crisis

Edward and Mindy lived in a smart Alec building.

'I hope this reform really hurts!!'

'Looks like the cable merger is concentrating too much market in one telecommunications giant.'

"We worked out how to make the watch smaller, now we just need to figure out how to make it lighter!"

Pollution and money

"Our cars aren't just smart, they've got street smarts!"

"You new guys should fit in working here."

White Apple

How soon can we expect computers to mow the lawn.

"The car is smart, but he's not. Apparently, he doesn't listen to it when it says it needs gas."

Welcome! We're the big box store that never forgets your face.

"We tried crowdsourcing the data, but the crowd turned into an angry mob and threw bogus data at us."