Bicycle Courier Gifts

"On your left."

"It started as a crusade. Now it's just a commute."

Man-spreading, Dutch style.

"I like going to school...and I like coming home from school. It's all the stuff in the middle that gives me trouble."

Bike Rides

"Candy wuld be nice onice in a while."

Food deliverer's baby.

"Bob! Your manure's here!"

"Faster! Middle age is gaining on you!"

Bumper stickers: 'Keep on Truckin''; 'Keep on Trunkin''.

A dog postal worker delivers through a letterbox in a doggy door.

"Mail's here."

'Hurry up: We've sprung a leak!'

Recalculating!

"I'm interested in working with animals and deliveries."

"Sorry it's late. I got caught in Spring migration."

"I wish you would actually sell one of these novels...all these returned manuscripts are giving me backaches!"

"It's another e-mail from your folks. You know, this would be a whole lot easier if you'd just tell them about the Web."

"What makes you think this could be a suspect package?"

"Boss, can you check the address again? I have a bad feeling about this one."

'I thought I'd never say this, but I think we might've traveled too far this time!'

"Don't feel bad, my mail server goes down sometimes, too."

The Consequences of an Interrupted Shower.

'Honey, it's your worms of the month delivery!'

"When did you first notice your wife was missing?"

Suburban street.

'Oh oh...this isn't my mace, it's whipped cream!'

'It has ten speeds but only one has been used.'

'A Telegram, M'Lord.'

Clerk: 'Boy that Delivery guy sure has a THICK accent!'

'Personally I was happier before we branched out into courier services.'

Astronaut startled by post delivered to spaceship.

"Do you have experience delivering anything other than eggs?"

"I don't know the letter carrier's name, but I can't help thinking of him as 'Bill'."

'Next day to the coast! You must be nuts!'