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A Book Review of the Phone Book: A hefty paperback with too many characters and not enough plot development. Next week, we'll review a more complex work--your phone bill.

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

'The iceman cometh too soon!'

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

"I think I may have stumbled on something, Walpole."

'Alas, poor Yorick, I knew you well. But dude, you're creeping me out, so I gotta un-friend you!'

German Expressionist Breakfast

"The spoon, he ran away with the goddam spoon."

The writer: something who devotes a lifetime of solitude to the same of communication.

John Bunyan

"Have you read any of Shakespeare's plays?"

Robinson decided to name him 'Casual Friday'.

'Yes, all at once!'

Audio Books

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

'Yorick? No, I don't think so, unless of course he was a Neanderthal!'

Emily Dickinson: Mime - "I think she's saying something about death."

"How was I supposed to know that the apple was a controlled substance?"

Getting to Know You

Rape of the Lock- The Dream

TSA Noah

"Today, I'll be cherry-picking from Deuteronomy."

'It's a novel based on a movie adapted from a magazine article that was inspired by a video game.'

Humpty Dumpty goes bungee jumping.

"It's about the murder of an editor who refuses to publish a writer's work..."

There were originally four musketeers. He said that the pen is mightier than the sword.

Myths and legends...

Moby Dick

"Eye of pie...a**e of rat...p**s of newt."

Shakespeare. Hamlet. Romeo and Juliet. "To be or not to be, that is the question". "We are such stuff …As dreams are made of …" "What's in a name? That which we call a rose by any other word would small as sweet." That Shakespeare guy had some neat sound bites.

'Fyodor Dostoevsky sends weeks describing Alexy Karamazov's quest for a white whale, and then discards the entire chapter."

Shakespeare Street

"If the stars should appear one night in a thousand years, how would men believe and adore, and preserve for many generations the remembrance of the city of God which had been shown! … Emerson" "Good boy!"

"Believe me it's only an apple."