Beverage Specialist Pillows

'Remember, the real lemon goes into the floor cleaner and the artificial lemon goes into the lemonade.'

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

"This brew is quite hoppy - they must of added too much toad."

"Moments like this make me glad I taught you how to fetch mojitos."

'Excuse me, but do you have a decaffeinated baristo?'

"I've tasted better myself, but you've got to admit the service is good."

"As an avid red wine drinker, I can say, with certainty, that the notion that drinking clarity impares claret is false!"

"Scotch and water musick."

'No, you're not calling at a bad time. I'm a professional wine taster - it's alwasys a good time.'

'Hey, pal... do you have a wine that tastes like beer?'

"Shower beers? Aisle eight."

"The Ususal, Mr. B?"

Man at work sees in lounge refrigerator, 'Creative Juices'

'Your switching to Scotch? And after I've given you the best beers of my life!'

"What'll ya have?"

Man Trying to Uncork Champagne.

'The travel agent says there's nothing available on the port side. Do you want me to see if she's got anything on the sherry side?'

"For years after Vietnam, I woke up screaming about the cold weather in Toronto."

'And this is my dad. He's the wine critic for The Herald and he can drink your dads under the table.'

"Baldo, the summer is almost gone and you still haven't found a job!"

Golfballs 19th drinking hole

"Brandy, coffee, decaf, herb tea, or cran-apple?"

MAN OF THE YEAR, 'You must come here a lot.'

Vampire drinking 'Blood Light'

"Lemonade" "Vodka"

I'm going to hate myself in the morning, but I hate everything in the morning.

Scientific Tea.

"Old Martini Had A Farm"

'It's not quite ready now, but come 2285, you'll be glad you waited.'

'How about I leave the last splinter in? It'll be a good reminder to not take things literally, at your next barrel tasting.'

London Gin Company Limited - By Appointment to Queen Mother

'We let 65 people try the '03 Malbec and told them they couldn't just describe it as 'good'. The result: 65 said it was 'very good'.'