Beverage Enthusiast Pillows

J-J-JOE'S B-B-BAR, 'Actually, Joe's done pretty well for a guy with a speech impediment.'

'This Pinot Grigio reminds me of Miami Beach - they're both close to water.'

'I think globally but I drink locally!'

We'll take coffee, tea, soda, whatever. We're into flex fuels.

'Test your sophistication!'

Man standing in front of a vending machine for cold drinks

'Our small drink is medium, our medium is large, and our large is illegal.'

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

New! Lemon-Lime Flavor Water Fountain.

In a bar; guest is checking the wine and the bartender is checking the money...

The Corkscrew Thrower

You heard of the 'drugs tsar' and the 'fat tsar'...well this is the new 'waiting room tsar!'

'A Stewardess's Cupboard.' On a shelf are a Jar of COFFEE, a tin of TEA, and a box of ME.

MAN OF THE YEAR, 'You must come here a lot.'

'The travel agent says there's nothing available on the port side. Do you want me to see if she's got anything on the sherry side?'

"But we don't have a 'happy hour' or a half-time interval."

"Don't feel bad. The rest of us can't hold our liquor either."

'The poor guy thinks he's Napolean brandy.'

34th Honeymoon

'I noticed your wine list only has reds and whites. Don't you have any yellow wines?'

Good duck, bad duck.

'And this is my dad. He's the wine critic for The Herald and he can drink your dads under the table.'

Have you ever noticed that the more complicated the order, the more gay the orderee?

"As an avid red wine drinker, I can say, with certainty, that the notion that drinking clarity impares claret is false!"

East End Ginger Beer Vendor

"I'm ready to switch"

They said he couldn't have a two-liter soda, and he just went crazy!

Before you learn to make the perfect ale, my son, you must first learn to make the perfect little bowl of nuts and pretzels.

Once chocolate bar. Colombian, Peruvian, Tibetan? 40 percent cocoa? 70 percent cocoa? 85 percent? 86.2 percent? With hazelnuts, almonds, walnuts, peanuts, sesame seeds, chili flakes, wasabi, kalamata olives? Chocolate! And a water. Bottled? Fizzy? Flavored? Vitamin-enhanced? Don't hurt me.

The extreme pessimist. Not only is it half empty, I'll bet it's watered down!

Coconut smoothies stand on desert island.

"Moments like this make me glad I taught you how to fetch mojitos."

"Brandy, coffee, decaf, herb tea, or cran-apple?"

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

boy plugging leak in a barrel with his finger