Benefits Gifts

'As you go through life, always remember that money isn't everything...Health benefits and stock options are also very important.'

'I can't give you a raise, Milhouse, because I'm going broke supplying you with health care.'

'You're offering me a job, eh? -- does it have portable benefits?'

'I had considered a career as an offshore commodities broker specialising in securitised asset transfers but the pension wasn't as good.'

Stopping smoking at work had given Tim the energy to explore his creativity ... 'And I like to call this my dance of the fourth quarters 'profit and loss' account.'

'I'm sorry, Louis. I should have warned you that I installed a speed bump in front of the refrigerator.'

Labor Day '19

"You're entitled to ten sick days, five personal days and four complete do-overs."

"No, we don't have a pension plan. We don't expect our employees to ever retire."

loan

'Desks equipped with airbags - for now that's our company's health plan.'

'Yes,I do have a question.. What kind of dental plan do you have?'

Our dental plan consists of a toothbrush and toothpaste.

Will work for 6-figure salary, excellent health care plan, and generous retirement package.

'Now I understand why people want to give them up.'

I'll put my nose to the grindstone and shoulder to the wheel, which reminds me, how's the health plan?

'Does your company have a dental plan?'

'I don't need your love. I need a 401 (k) and health insurance.'

"Bye! good luck with the 'stop smoking 'campaign!"

"And this is where we introduced our new customer care policy."

You've got to hand it to George..he NEVER lets a sale go without a fight.

Small business nurturing employee health insurance.

"Fred read red wine has lots of benefits including a longer life!"

'With 13 holidays per year, 2 weeks sick leave, 2 coffee break each day, 4 weeks vacation a year, 80% of ife and health insurance, profit sharing, including various discounts and you still want a salary?'

Employee Benefits

'Why, there isn't even a company folder for 'Perks'!'

'What's a 13 letter word that means BENEFITS PACKAGE?'

Fisherman to friend about to be devoured by shark: 'Bill, are you familiar with the health benefits of shark cartilage?'

Smokers.

'What's your threshold of pain when it comes to salary and benefits?'

High blood pressure - watch golf on TV

New Improved Child Support Agency

'The employees are angry because the company tennis courts are always busy!' 'LET THEM PLAY GOLF!'

"I must insist you stop drinking."

"Oh no! It's another lecture on his pension contributions!"