Bell Hop Pillows

You called? What can I do for you?

5pm Happy Hour. 6pm discussion: what is true happiness?

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

"Buy a man a six-pack, he drinks for a day. Teach him to brew, he drinks all his life."

Beer Stall

Best Before 5th Pint.

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

'The secret to life, my friend, is hoppiness!'

Traditional Ale - Traditional Drunk

'Here comes your own personal weekly beer supply, Joe!'

"I know my drinking limits.The problem is that I can never reach them - I simply fall down."

Just the one...

"The Ususal, Mr. B?"

Nature Lovers

'That's her second pitcher and she doesn't even like beer - I guess she just likes to pee.'

'The bigger they are... The harder they hit!'

"The candy on the pillow is a nicety of the house."

'Your switching to Scotch? And after I've given you the best beers of my life!'

'They've made this 3D football really realistic, it even chucks coins at you.'

Pub restrooms; Thugs - Thugettes

Next Round Indicator

'My - You've matured, my dear.'

'Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine... LAST!'

"Of all the wet cement, in all the towns, in all the world, she walks in mine."

"Call me a taxi if I start foaming at the mouth."

'Avoid the Christmas rush, drink now.

"Gotta go, lads, I smell death."

The Stumble Inn Bar & Grill

'Talking of of big tops have you seen the new barmaid at the Green Dragon?'

"I'm floating in pure vodka; feel free to dip your glass in if you'd like."

'I feel cosmopolitan tonight, Joe - Give me a scotch with an irish Chaser.'

"Your shout!"

"Loves it, just can't get the little fellow off it"

Sports Fan - Whoever's Winning

'Well, that's how we mix martinis around here.'