Behavior Modification Advocate T-Shirts

Santa Claus's Mail

'Maybe it is psychosomatic.'

"Breathe in and reimagine yourself in a world where you lived a healthy lifestyle."

Carrot VS Stick

"I plan on keeping this off my resume!"

"My System 1 tells me she's articulate, capable, shrewd. My System 2 says BIMBO."

Pavlov's dog

"He's so well behaved I'm really worried, doctor."

"They took my pellets, man, I been hitting' that lever al day, they took my PELLETS!"

"You have a remarkable lack of curiosity about your co-workers."

"I don't want them to smell fear, so I'm going to roll in something before the interview."

' 'Peppermint thumb' is one of our toughest cases to cure.'

"People are crazy."

Freudian vs Behavior therapist.

Respect Zone: 'We respect yobs.'

Before the Salivating Dogs

"We assumed they were raised by wolves, but I'm beginning to believe they were raised by stray dogs."k Upload

'They're using honey to draw us out. Fortunately, they underestimate our willpower.'

'Sure I do bad things, but I do them in moderation.'

Sigmund Freud

Silent Body Language

"My teacher noticed you weren't at parent-teacher night . She wanted to ask why I never take an interest in anything."

'Things were fine until the day that kid yelled 'Hey look at that ugly duck with the black mole over it's beak and the long neck!'...To think I spent all those years parading around, thinking I was a swan. I can't bear the embarrassment of it any longer.'

'I've had it up to here with your demonization of the culture of childhood.'

"I wouldn't say your son is a bad child. He's gifted at disruptive behavior."

"Anyhoo, it's malignant."

"I'm warning you, young lady. You've got to the count of three before I say 'I'm not kidding'."

'I keep getting leadership mixed up with incitement.'

Speculative hoarders in times of scarcity.

'I know some of your students are disruptive, but don't let your temper explode, Count down before blasting off,'