Beer Critic Pillows

"...an excellent fighting lager with just a hint of park bench."

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

'My luck, I buy a bottle of wine from 450 B.C. and it's still five years from reaching maturity.'

'I wasted half my life perched on top of a mountain in the Himalayas. Only to discover that the true meaning of life was a night in watching the box, with a few cans of lager.'

Beer Stall

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

'You wanted to be a wine maker in the worst way, Paul - and you've succeeded.'

My belief is if you're old enough to take texts, counter-texts, and meta-texts in Western Philosophy, you should be old enough to drink.

'The secret to life, my friend, is hoppiness!'

'As Chuck's definition of terroir dragged past the 20-minute mark, Suzy concluded, the longer the explanation, the less likely you know what the word means.'

'So it's the Mumm's Cordon Rouge, '98 Pouilly-Fuisse, '86 Chateau Margaux, and the '92 Barsac - would you like any food?'

Don Quixote

"If the weather stays good, we could end up in a very prestigious 1992 Cabernet Sauvignon."

"Try this new IPA I just finished. Let me know if the malts and hops are layered like last week's batch." "Bailey was a really 'good boy'."

'So much for your theory that mixing two 50-point-rated wines equals one rated 100.'

'That's her second pitcher and she doesn't even like beer - I guess she just likes to pee.'

'Who says justice has to be the only thing on tap?'

"I detect a subtle bouquet of money."

I'm getting an ample full taste... I'm getting whimsical... I'm getting 'red'

"Quick swig first?"

'Are you sure this wine is ten years old?' - 'Yes, I remember opening it ten years ago.'

Wine tasting

Red Wine

"You want organic, we'll make it organic."

Lightest beer on the market. Carbonated with helium.

"When a wine rates over ninety, this is not alcoholism."

'Would you like me to wipe the cup with my finger or would you prefer Rover here licking it clean?'

"This wine tastes like a**....Bring me every bottle you have!"

'As soon as I mention Nietzsche - stop serving me, okay.'