Bedtime T-Shirts

'Yeah. Yeah... Wolf, girl, grandma. I got the picture.'

'Freddie, the Little Merger Mogul, didn't expect to have a monopoly right away...'

"'Moby-Dick'? Again?"

"And what's the story behind the story?"

"Maybe little Jack Horner became argumentative because he was backed into a corner, leaving him no options."

"An interesting selection, Dad, yet essentially a failure-as you can see, I'm still awake."

'When London Bridge fell down, how much was the contractor sued for?'

"Stop asking so many questions, or it's right back to Books on Tape for you."

'Once upon a time...'

'I'm going to say prayers. Anybody want anything?'

'That's all for tonight, God. Stay tuned.'

"Have you chosen your bedtime story yet, Tommy?"

'I'm so glad this bedtime story comes in audio.'

"Wow, your parents let you stay up all night!"

'Just FYI...so far your overall communication scores are pretty dismal. Do go on.'

'... And they lived happily ever after, until she got pregnant and had a couple of brats who wouldn't go to sleep!'

'Then Jack told his mother they were getting out of the dairy business and going into crop production.'

'Okay, one more saga and then off you go to sleep.'

'Okay, one book. But if I catch you skipping pages we start over.'

"Can't you just look at the pictures,daddy? Some of us have to get up for school in the morning!"

'And that's the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, according to the Brothers Grimm.'

'No, I don't think the three little pigs had to pay restitution to the wolf's widow.'

"That little piggy can't have roast beef - I'm a vegetarian!"

"A plague of frogs? Awesome!"

'She didn't notice it was a wolf and not her grandma?? Had grandma never heard of electrolysis??'

"At last they paid off their sub-prime fairy-tale and lived happily ever after."

Ant story: 'and so they worked all day and they worked all night and then they worked some more, the end.'

So the prince and princess lived happily ever after, but elsewhere, fighting continued.

'And the Princess said, 'Please listen carefully as the menu has changed. Press one if...''

'Look - when I read you a fairy tale, don't keep saying 'Really?' '

'An owl and a pussycat? -- Is that even legal?'

'Oh no, I put Rusty out. But man! I have an awful stomache ache! I think I need ice cream....separate bowls.'

'Can you leave the light on? It's hard to sleep with the dark shining in my eyes.'

"Many, many news cycles ago..."

And so with a positive attitude and proper algorithm, the LIttle Search Engine that Could got over the hill and brought back the information!