Bedtime Buddy T-Shirts

"Tonight, let's not do the thing where you snore and kick up your hind legs in your sleep."

"Which side do you want?"

"Damn. I took the Rip Van Nyquil."

'I don't mind sharing my bed with you, but do you have to wear my pajamas?'

"I'm not napping yet, but I am getting ready to with a pre-nap warm up."

'I don't mind him sleeping on our bed but why must he wear MY pyjamas?'

'A bed just isn't the same without a person in it.'

"C'mon. Get off the bed."

Late night teddy reading

Being and Nothingness Pop-Up! (book)

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown and Jill said 'I told you so'."

'Please make us instruments of Thy peace, starting with Bucky Sims.'

Shadow Puppet Bunny Threatened By Shadow Hawk

The Poky Little Pupa.

'She's just great with the children.'

'Read me the one about the ant and the obsessive-compulsive grasshopper.'

Now Simon would have nightmares about his mother's failing eyesight.

"So, when he says, 'What a good boy am I,' Jack is really reinforcing his self-esteem."

'Put some feeling into it. I can't tell the difference between the lion and the mouse.'

Ant story: 'and so they worked all day and they worked all night and then they worked some more, the end.'

"And if that diamond ring don’t shine, Poppa will probably take it back to 47th Street and get something for your mother."

"Customers who bought 'The Three Little Pigs' also bought...."

"I'm actually pretty ready for bed."

"Oh,oh - here comes quality time again."

'The pile of unread books by the bed looks bigger than the futon...'

"That dream catcher may be working a little too well."

'Am I looking sad or happy in the appropriate places?'

Why don't you ever like to spoon?

"She married and then divorced, and then she married and divorced, and then she married and lived happily ever after."

'I've always loved your adventurousness in bed.'

"And this little piggy went – whoa! Where is your fifth little piggy?!"

"Well did he?"

'I'll take him.'

"I'm sad to hear everybody lived happily ever after. That means no sequels to this story."

"My mother taught me about baking. She was a great roll model!"