Bedtime Battlers Pillows

Parents sleeping with a new baby.

'Note to myself: Next time I'm wide awake half the night, just get up, DO NOT fall asleep 10 minutes before the alarm goes off!'

'Can you leave the light on? It's hard to sleep with the dark shining in my eyes.'

"Go to bed!""No!"

Being and Nothingness Pop-Up! (book)

'I've always loved your adventurousness in bed.'

"Instead of taking a bath couldn't I just run through a carwash?"

The Forever Stamp

'Cover me... I'm going in.'

'...and then the DOW rallied six hundred points and the three bears felt like idiots...'

"Houston, we have a problem!"

'I wish we lived in one of those later time zones.'

'I'm pretty sleepy tonight, Dad - could we just skip ahead to the chase scene?'

Stop hogging the sheets

"I have to say, sleeping in a coffin is way better since I got the box spring."

"Would you mind getting me the Ambien, the Tiger Balm, three cookies, a cup of tea and a pillow for my legs?"

Center For Sleep Deprivation

A boy who doesn't want to put down his drum while he prays

'...now pour the mixture into a baking dish...'

'I can't sleep... Tell me about your day at the office again.'

Sleeping masks

'Early to bed and early to rise? It's a deal.'

"I realize you want to enjoy every last minute of summer, but it's not possible to stay awake until school starts."

'And another thing - you hog the duvet!'

'All right. I'll get forty winks, but not one wink more.'

'And so we come to the concluding episode of Barthelmew Cubbins and the 500 hats.'

Welcome,dear, to the Garden of Weedin.

"Yes, Mom, I'm just finishing texting my payers now!"

Time stood still – which made it an easy target.

Bob takes care of this monster-under-the-bed business once and for all.

'Early to bed and early to rise. I like a saying with an escape clause.'

'Why is it that there are so many bedtime stories about stupid princes and princesses, but no cool ones about zombies and chainsaws?'

A sleeping man counting scuba-diving sheep

"Our marriage will last a whole lot longer if you move and breathe minimally."

'Thank you for calling the Zepco mattresses hotline...'