Bedding T-Shirts

"I only told him I needed bedding."

'Make up your mind, folks... King size or Queen size?'

'They lived here for a long time.'

'Pillow too soft?'

"My incentive for losing weight? I bought a fitted sheet a size to small."

"Look, I still fit into the fitted sheet I wore when we met."

Memory-foam pillows...

How Snakes Sleep.

"Squeeze a monkey! They've only gone and taken all the blanket again!"

"Bed Clothes"

Bedding. High security blankets

'I tell you what: A good mattress and silk sheets make hibernating a lot nicer!'

"I'm just going to ring the doorbell so I have a chance of a spot in the bed."

'That's what I'm talkin' about.'

Morning stretch.

New! Corduroy Pillows! They're making headlines!

'They say women are the weaker sex, but have you ever tried getting a duvet off your wife at three in the morning?'

"I'm breaking in a new pillow."

What kind of pillows are those? Down, boy! I've been waiting years to say that! (Published originally on Feb. 17, 2014.)

Sometimes I regret choosing a fitted sheet.

What kind of pillows are those? Down, boy! I've been waiting years to say that!

"I sleep on my side, but I pass out on my stomach."

Killer Executive Suits.

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

Men's Suits. I hear being suave and sophisticated is coming back in style. That's just an urbane legend.

CLOTHES-HORSES OF THE ART SCENE

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

Bank Loan Dept. Personal Business. Uh-oh, some loans have gone bad! A tennis pro defaulted and a novelist is in Chapter 7. The bed linens company folded and the scuba school went under! Are any of our loans still good? Yeah, the music streaming service is totally sound! And ironically, the lighting company is in the black!

Two women wearing identical dresses head toward exchange window at department store.

'We live in difficult times. These underwear don't help one bit.'

'She's so put together!'

"Most of these pelts were suicides."

When laundry ruled the waves.

"I think I've found the most comfy jeans."

"Oh to be young and in love and wear things cut on the bias."