Bedding Buff Pillows

"I only told him I needed bedding."

Sometimes I regret choosing a fitted sheet.

"They're exactly the same, except in Hell you have to put on your own duvet cover."

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

'Now here's a place I like!'

"I'm just going to ring the doorbell so I have a chance of a spot in the bed."

Baking

"I believe it took a team of twenty five, working six months at a cost of �250, 000 to come up with that."

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Beat Fatigue - Stay in Bed.

' ... and this is the half bath.'

'Make up your mind, folks... King size or Queen size?'

Gerald Ratner's return

SupermarketAwful Market.

Appointments and Disappointments

"My incentive for losing weight? I bought a fitted sheet a size to small."

"I've got a great idea! By adding the words "and associates" to my business name, no one will every suspect I'm really just one person with a phone and a web site working out of my bedroom!"

"Try thinking like a different brand."

"Maybe we'd do better if we called ourselves 'baristas'."

Our New Slogan: Make Money.

Turning 'Raw Hype' Into 'Pure Hype'

"Mom wants us to spend 'Quality time' together, so don't blame me."

Vincent Van Goth.

"In the marketplace of ideas, we may not have the best ideas, but we have the best marketing."

Office Furniture - Would you like to thump the table sir, to hear what it sounds like?

Woman crushed under satin sheets.

The Bargain Brand

"P.J. is right. 'Rock solid financial product' does sound better than 'contrived get rich quick scheme.'"

"Squeeze a monkey! They've only gone and taken all the blanket again!"

"I bought this 'automatic bread maker', and so far it hasn't made any!"

A cat spells out Google in its litter box.

Elon Musk upset that 'X'is still referred to as 'Twitteer'.

Sports Sponsorship "What do you mean he lost?"

'It's not really rsutling, it's rebranding."

"Advertising is a simple business, Nathan. Always remember that less is more, except, of course, for those situations where less is actually less."