Becoming A Father Pillows

"Let me guess -- first child?"

"Nature, nurture or a bit of both?"

Roger Buffle Jr. supplies his father with yet another computer password.

"I thought that sperm-bank donors remained anonymous."

'The good looking one is mine!'

Fathers are Heroes

'I'm a work-at-home dad.'

Hell's Angel and baby buggy.

Clown baby.

"Congratulations! You're the proud father of 5 thousand squirming little maggots!"

'You never knew your father - he got stuck in a tree somewhere.'

'Here comes the proud father, now!'

'Why can't you try to be more like me?'

"Congratulations, Counselor. It's a boy and your wife's fine. She just had a little difficulty passing his fin through the birth canal."

'I want to give my children all the things I never had. Then move in with them.'

"Can you wangle me some parental leave?"

"If you insist on doing all the voices, Dad. Don't you think father bear should have a deeper voice than Goldilocks?"

'They call them gifts, but they make you pay for them.'

Father bird smoking a cigar on a line graph.

"Looks like your request for paternity leave has a low lift-off factor!"

"That's mine!"

Man in stilts pushing his kid along in a very tall chair

"Which one's yours?"

Father changing nappy, "Heir freshener"

"Yecch! How can something so sweet put out something so yucky?"

'Another expectant father looking forward to paternity leave.'

'Your wife has had triplets. I suggest you go home and get some of the sleep you won't get in the next several years.'

'O-possum is my father. Call me 'possum'.'

Hairy father with a bald baby.

'Nest Accessories.'

'Changing diapers isn't so bad, as long as you don't look down.'

Just get her home before she evolves.

'Brace Yourself.'

A man outside of gents toilet sees sign: New Men - With Baby changing facilities.

Gregson is a real family man.