Beauty Trend Tracker T-Shirts

"I'm thinking of waxing my back."

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

Sale on the same stuff as last week.

"I've seem an awful lot of movies ever since they cut them all down to two minutes."

Two women wearing identical dresses head toward exchange window at department store.

"Do you do temporary ones that last about two weeks?"

Studies show foods work miracles!

"Hey, remember a few days ago, when all this was unacceptable?"

'This is too small. Get me a 12...How many times?! I'm a 10 or a 12 on top and a 12 or 14 on the bottom depending on the shop, the cut of the fabric, the ambient air temperature, and the rotation of Pluto...and we always try the 10 first capiche?'

"Walking erect is very trendy now."

"I'm not telling you to stay. I'm talking to the stock market."

"As you can see, sales have been a little erratic lately..."

'ACE Heating and cooling' 'What's Hot' 'What Not'

On Aug. 3, 1992, the Moon rose over the horizon wearing heavy eye-liner and mohawk. Fortunately it was just a phase.

"I'll have you know that, '#dirtylitterbox' is trending on Twitter."

"Faster! Middle age is gaining on you!"

"We're making a video of us watching TV so we can watch ourselves watching TV...later."

Inflating Boobs.

"There's a lot of uncertainty out there these days. Or not. Who knows?"

"Pumpkin spice has been very good to me."

Final words on gravestones.

"Honey, why don’t you tell Tony and Karen about your microdosing-healing-group thingy or whatever the heck it is?"

"What are you doing?"

"D'you remember caramel before it all became 'salted?'"

"This afternoon, we'll be turning our attention to Guess jeans."

"Not until you've arranged your pillows."

"Which way up do you want it?"

"Here we go again, every 30,000 years or so this Paleo diet becomes a fad."

In the not too distant future... "It's a tribal butterfly tramp stamp, honey. Same as yours."

'We're looking for something that captures the zeitgeist of the nation...you know, the Great American Tweet.'

"One man with a mustache is manly. Sexy. Magnetic."

"Which 'ism' am I this week, Ms. Trotter?"

Diet Books: Fiction/Non-Fiction

"How are the new lips feeling babe?"

"My new watch has a G.P.S. function but it always puts me in the right place at the wrong time."