Beard Enthusiasts Pillows

'Oh, he hates the itching and scratching, but he's terrified of lip readers.'

"Well, at least he accomplished something during the lockdown."

Hipsters knit their beards.

"Very good Mr Johnson. Now perhaps you could repeat your proposal whilst simultaneously stroking your beard? Somehow that makes you more convincing..."

"Do you have light and an extinguisher?"

Santa shaves

Sleeping man uses his beard as a book mark.

"Dad, when someone your age grows a beard it's cultural appropriation."

Back-Stage Shaving

Beard must be this long to wear this t-shirt.

'You smell like mothballs.'

Strategic Growth.

Pick your own whiskers.

"As soon as vacation's over, off it comes."

"Renk just discovered beard oil."

"Don't shave it. It gives your face character."

Emergency Hipster Beard

A daily rubdown with a beard brush will wrangle awkward bristles and train them downwards...

'The siege is working my lord. They have food and water but no beard oil. I reckon they will surrender in 12 hours or less'

wattle covers

General Meade's Army, Near Culpepper - Shaving in Camp

"Face it, Clive - you're bald."

The Beard in the Stone

'...so I simply combined my love of beards with my love of tattoos and this was the result!'

"Actually, I think you looked better WITH a beard."

'Long shift?'

"You're fortunate. Stubble looks really good on you."

Bearded Leftie.

Shakespeare Quote

Official Team Cap With Beard

The Organic

"I noticed a few browns."

'To grow a good beard, have good dental habits. First, brush with a concave brush to clean the teeth's facial surfaces. Then use a convex brush to reach flat surfaces. Then use a scalloped brush to be chic. Then floss to clean between teeth. Then use ...

"Would the gentleman care for a razor and comb to start?"

Peak Beard/High Peak Beard