Beady Eye Observer Pillows

Scenic Root: ants, bugs and worms using an exposed tree root as a scenic route.

"When will somebody cut the grass?"

"Life: play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, play, school, first love, brief happiness, breakup, regret, school, school, school, school, school, school, school, school, school, school, play, work, play, w

Life and Death

"Come on, be a sport! The cliffs are lined with kids and bus-loads of retirees: let's give them a breaching display to remember!"

Sword Swallow is Bitten by a Mosquito.

'It's not so much you having a cockroach problem - it's more along the lines of us having a human problem.'

'Have you ever noticed that as you get older, your thin things get thicker and your thick things get thicker?'

'See that ant, Norm - He is in a world of his own, completely unaware that he is being watched.'

Sooner or later, 'These trying times' become 'The good ol' days'.'

There are planets where lifeforms are almost human...

I've always said ignorance is bliss, but what do I know?

A bird pulls the thread from a magic carpet.

'Man, when was the last time you had your eyes tested?'

Oculist.

'I say, it really shows off your astigmatism to its greatest advantage, doesn't it?'

"Trust me, this place is worth the wait."

'Why John, I remember you when you were this high.'

"I think I'm going to fall! Will one of you please make a note of the sound in case anyone every asks?"

Gardener to husband as giant insects approach, 'Your prediction that nature will retaliate for our environmental misuse of pesticides strains credulity, Ralph.'

'If there is an unlimited supply of something....mortality is that it make our time finite....I think I'll poop on this guy's head.'

'Great! There's no rain forecast for today: It's safe to go out...'

Hearse on an emergency

"Miss Jones, get up here and change this eye chart, please!"

Lawyer with no work makes himself look busy

"You're not old. You just have more leeway to scold strangers, and their kids, and feel good about it."

"After I had my eyes lasered, the people down there stopped looking like ants. Plump, furry and delicious little rodents, yes, but not ants!"

'Where do cartoonists, like you, get your ideas'

The seven ages of dudes

"So son, this is the no-fly zone I was telling you about: although they are trying to shoot clay pigeons, it is safer to avoid the area altogether..."

"We're not as annoying up here. Let's go back down to the lamp by the reading chair."

"Just think - somewhere down there someone is doing something inappropriate!"

"When did we go from being edgy to being cranky?"