Battlefield Gourmet T-Shirts

"Staring down the enemy in the heat of battle! That is how sausage is made!"

"Everything on our menu uses organic, locally sourced, graveyard-to-table ingredients."

Holiday Supplies

"Impressive, yes, but what exactly is a black belt in cookery?"

'I've decided to skip my senior year and go directly into an endless cycle of unrealistic expectations and failure.'

'We're going to look pretty stupid if it's not a Michelin star.'

"All right, we straighten this out immediately! René threw the bouillabaisse at Jacques, no? The Jam-bon en croûte was thrown by Jacques at René, correct? The truite en gelée and the fraises des bois were thrown by François at Henri, and Henri threw the mousse au chocolat at François, and . . ."

'LOOK RENOLDSON, i've had JUST about enough of your moaning and groaning! IF you can't stand the heat, GET out of the oven!' / A chef scolding his apprentice inside an oven.

Bowl Games.

Spiro & Pusho cook a chicken on a volcano

'Now watch and listen!'

"Mmm....say, cookie! What's this garbage you're feeding us?"

"If the packers lose I'll eat my hat."

"Just picking up some Super Bowl provisions."

Computer camp's not exactly what I expected.

"I still call it a custard tart but to be honest, it's a dairy free, soy fructose mix, with no nuts."

"I ain't particular, but are you sure a '71 claret is the right choice for these here beans?"

Cooking Cowboy

Why Shirley hates to eat genetic modified Broccoli.

"Well, we went through the fruit and veg, and thought we should try something more exotic - like the space-time continuum."

"What do you think the delivery time is on a drone pizza?"

'Well, we've got to go to Milan for the second leg and coming back from 4-0 down won't be easy, but the lads are conf. . .'

'I thought you wanted to get more involved with my sports.'

'... Now this releases me from any liability. And this form ...' 'Fred's legal experiences in civilian life interfered with his work in a war zone.'

'The groundhog won't come out of his hole. He's too hungover from super bowl Sunday.'

"Cemetery Pie"

"What do you think? Would flaming marshmallows make good torches?"

"Set phazers to medium rare!"

'WIll that be with or without methane, sir?'

Pizza Fencing

Football Food.

"Well, I don't care if it is some kind of fancy-schmancy restaurant...if I want ketchup, I'm gonna get ketchup!"

'If we beat Napoleon, do you think when they invent passenger trains they will name a station after this lot?'

Throw another hedgehog on the fire, would you pet?

Traditional chefs revolt against new 'Robo-chef'' technology.