Batman Aficionado Pillows

Leave it, I never answer the landline anymore

"I'm Batman."

"Take your time, Ma'am. Can you identify your least favorite Batman?"

'Look, you can only do so much!'

International Women's Day

Batman at the Maternity Ward

"A retired superhero's re-purposed utility belt"

"Now that's what I call customer service!"

'Go on, Andy, it's high time anteaters learned size isn't everything!'

"For the last time stupid, you're tin man, you are not by any leap of the imagination, anything like Iron Man!"

The Amazing Man-Spider

"Hey Pete, why do you think they call it a 'Supermoon?'"

One vampire tricks another behind a mirror.

"You've changed."

Superheroes take a selfie

He is familiar with the silent swoop of the evening bat.

"Honey! Where are my lucky Incredible Hulk board meeting socks?!?"

Middle-Age Superheroes

Mighty Man Of Justice Goes Christmas Shopping Part 1

Deep in the heart of the RAND think tank, the world's greatest scientists would gather to brainstorm Batman's fight sounds.

"Stop summoning me about rising sea levels. I do costumed supervillains staling jewels, men in beanies grabbing handbags - that sort of thing."

Introducing...Anagraman.

'Hi, my name is Bruce Wayne, but not THE Bruce Wayne!'

"I feel like bad guys aren't as scared of me in the summer."

Mister Bundles VS. The Martians - Part Eighteen

Mayhem, Inc. Part 29

"Honey, where did you put my Green Lantern cufflinks?!"

"Don't make me warn you again, monkey. Stay outa the curiosity racket."

Mayhem, Inc. Part 1: Prologue

Mayhem, Inc. Part 21

Atomic Bear: Part 21

Mighty Man Of Justice Is Born

"Spoiler alert! I'm about to tell you the part that really bugged me about 'Wolverine.'" "You don't have to say 'spoiler alert,' minion. It's been a month." "Anyone who hasn't seen it yet has not fulfilled their role as a dutiful consumer, and deserves whatever spoilage they will receive." "In fact, let me know who they are and I'll enter them into my database. When the corporatist revolution comes, there will be consequences." "Um... never mind."

Superheroes Having a Drink

"I witnessed something I can never unsee." "What happened, little buddy?" "Some guy walking out of the 'Wolverine' premiere shouted spoilers to the crowd that was waiting to see the second show." "A bunch of the fans who were dressed in costumes got so angry they attacked him." "I don't think I can ever unsee five Pyros and a Colossus beating a Happy Hogan with plastic flamethrowers." "Happy Hogan had it coming."