Bathtub Connoisseur Gifts

'So how are we doing my soak-master of the tub?'

'Let's see here... Mr. Stevens... it says you slipped in the tub and hit your head.'

"Think of it as a big puddle."

Baby Hairstyles.

'...and I only have eyes, for ewe...'

'That's her second pitcher and she doesn't even like beer - I guess she just likes to pee.'

Child Being Dirty in the Bath.

Loofah Lady

"How much?! Blimey, to get my money's worth, I'd need to use it EVERY WEEK!"

'You don't think you're just a tad overprotective?'

'He takes bathtime seriously.'

'How do you know I won't shrink if I didn't come with a washing instructions tag?'

The Tragedy of Prosperity

"How else will I know when I'm clean as a hound's tooth?"

"They're clean Mum, I washed them yesterday."

"Well, you said you wanted something to remove spiders from the bath!"

Man's rubber duck waits for him to have bath

'Moses, you'd better be in that bathtub!!'

Arhimedes had principles: 'I'm not getting in that bath till it's 23 degrees.'

Things were going extremely well until last night's chilli reared its ugly head.

'We're finally in - but how will we get out?'

'Don't just stand there, Mum - Your admiral has lost the soap!'

No you can't get out yet. You've only been in there for three hours

Captain Hook's lesser known brother - 'Captain Loofah Sponge',

The only creation God was truly proud of was the Sabbath

WC problem.

"Looks like Billy clogged up the toilet again."

Bathing and Showering.

Man in Bath

'The marriage counselor didn't save our marriage. The plumber and the second bathroom saved our marriage.'

"Scientists have found out that drinking alcohol can be dangerous...well, water can be dangerous, too!"

"Mind if I take a bath first, pet."

Sailor notices a sea mine in his foot bath.

A giant rubber duck with a human bath toy

'I think I'll let Goldie do a few lengths in the bath before I get in.'