Bathroom Queue Survivor T-Shirts

'I'm camping out here tonight. It's the only way I can guarantee getting into the bathroom in the morning!'

'That's her second pitcher and she doesn't even like beer - I guess she just likes to pee.'

The Tragedy of Prosperity

"Please fill out these forms. We don't need them for anything, but you're making me nervous staring at your watch."

"Looks like Billy clogged up the toilet again."

'The marriage counselor didn't save our marriage. The plumber and the second bathroom saved our marriage.'

"Actually, I didn't become dizzy and nauseous until I started inhaling the scent strips in the waiting room magazines."

'While on hold, press #1 for classical music. Press #2 for rock music. Press #3 for country music. Press #4 for...'

'Why can't you be like other men and just sing in the bath?'

Medusa's bathtub

"Travel the dark corridor over shoe mountain. Avoid the couch ogre lest he steal your soul. The third door is the bathroom you seek."

'Have you considered a second bathroom?'

'I don't know how I got rid of mildew before Henry got me the flamethrower.'

'Well, good morning Mr. Daniel, have a seat in our waiting room.'

'It's perfect! An indoor bathroom! How did you know?'

Toilets of Tuscany Tour

Do you know why the kitchen ceiling is dripping?

'This bathroom ain't big enough for the both of us.'

'I have another doctor, but I like your magazines better.'

'All clear!'

This toilet is thoroughly cleaned once a week. Sadly it's tomorrow.

Man wetting himself in a toilet queue.

Line for the women's restroom vs. line for the men's restroom

Dance of the Inconsistent Water Temperature

Bath with Pair of Stilts

Island With A Female Bathroom

'Ralph! You're spending WAY too much time in the rest room.'

Attempted First Degree Edgar

"Obviously, the toilet paper should go over the roll."

A woman is attacked by toilet water

"I slipped on a bar of soap in the bathtub, and my gun went off."

'We're having a bit of a problem with the drainage in our bathroom. . .How soon can you get somebody out to us?. . .Have you got anything earlier than Tuesday?'

Staff pick

"Fred, here's a catalog of bathroom fixtures. You're on page 5."