Barnyard Renovator Gifts

"Maybe we should cut back on those lawn catalogues."

Painting by the numbers for adults

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

'Ok, here comes farmer Brown, put these on and remember.......act natural!'

Painting the Ceiling

Shed Into Dream Playhouse.

Farm Humor.

"This the first time you guys ever installed an above-ground pool?"

'We've knocked out the interior walls to improve our home Wi-Fi coverage.'

"In my life, I've had seven cars, six jobs, five houses, four bypass operations, and three wives!"

Cock A Doodle

'This model is hard to get parts for.'

'And when you're done here honey, I have a nice periwinkle picked out for the foyer!'

"I think this is the perfect place to grow a family."

"Are you sure there wasn't a floor model?"

' ... and this is the half bath.'

"The parasol certainly paid for itself this summer."

Goddess of Fertility garden feature

A Cow Striptease

"Can we get a bigger pool to accommodate all my floats?"

"I use old Duke to check my steaks. If it feels like Duke's tongue, it's rare, if it feels like his ear, it's medium. . ."

"Next time, dear, ask me first before you invite a friend over for dinner."

'Nice barbecue, Normy!!'

'Dad, this is something I knocked up in the shed.'

'How are you doing on your side?'

'Check out the rack on this hot babe.'

Cut out and keep your own D.I.Y expert.

"Gesundtheit, Dear."

Pig tails connected. Title: 'Where Sausage Links Begin'

Cow Christmas anxiety dreams!

'This fish looked bored so we installed a rec room below their tank.'

"We'd like you to think of it not as a 'brick', but rather as an essential component of a potential self-build project."