Barnyard Artist Pillows

A hen paninting her eggs with egg-shell paint

Cock A Doodle

"The good old days of eating the washing off the line are all gone methinks: The farmer has bought an electric dryer..."

'Ok, here comes farmer Brown, put these on and remember.......act natural!'

'Oh, it's a long, long time...From here to November...'

"It turns out crows find a bunch of dead crows more frightening than a man made out of hay."

Goat about goat: 'He's no longer gruff since he's been on Prozac.'

"Next time you score show a little respect and don't spike uncle Frank so hard."

'This model is hard to get parts for.'

"I always knew you'd come back."

A Cow Striptease

"Next time, dear, ask me first before you invite a friend over for dinner."

Moo! OOM!

'Remember, chew every bite 32 times.'

Wife to husband dressed as pantomime cow: 'I know you're exhausted, love, but at least the panto season is now ... BEHIND YOU!!'

"Gesundtheit, Dear."

Cow Christmas anxiety dreams!

'Take a picture...it'll last longer.'

Ham-Dram

"Okay, now we're too domesticated."

You can always tell animals trained by 4H kids.

"Come off it, you're not working from dawn till dusk: You're working at dawn and at dusk..."

'Your barn door's open.'

'I've got to wake up extra early tomorrow morning. Any clue how to set this thing?'

'Oh quit griping and be thankful we even got a bonus this year!'

Scrooge McCow

Doctor to pig: 'You've been pigging out on pan pizzas, eh? I'm taking you off square meals.'

'With a herd of three cows it doesn't take long for inventory, does it, Dad?'

When Cows Discovered Mowers

"Dayum. She bootylicious."

'Oi! We're your nipples you idiot!'

"Wait … where’s Chicken Little? And who is ‘Kim Jong Un’?"

'Well, Dad, it's 2:00 AM and we've been messing with her all night...'

"I didn't mean to trample him. How do you say 'my bad' in human?"

"The summer people are coming! The summer people are coming!"