Barnyard Antics Admirer Pillows

Chickens.

Bubble Gum Farms.

'Ok, here comes farmer Brown, put these on and remember.......act natural!'

Cow Show Tunes

"Next time you score show a little respect and don't spike uncle Frank so hard."

"You're living in a fantasy world, Nelly. Farmer Dave doesn't know you're alive. Plus, he's a human being, he's married, he's the church pastor and he's secretly gay."

A Cow Striptease

Moo! OOM!

"Next time, dear, ask me first before you invite a friend over for dinner."

'Remember, chew every bite 32 times.'

'That hussy. She's always first in line for insemination.'

"Come off it, you're not working from dawn till dusk: You're working at dawn and at dusk..."

Cow Christmas anxiety dreams!

Wife to husband dressed as pantomime cow: 'I know you're exhausted, love, but at least the panto season is now ... BEHIND YOU!!'

You can always tell animals trained by 4H kids.

'Your barn door's open.'

'Oh quit griping and be thankful we even got a bonus this year!'

When Cows Discovered Mowers

"I not only have to wake up the cows, I have to wake up the rooster."

"Wait … where’s Chicken Little? And who is ‘Kim Jong Un’?"

'Oi! We're your nipples you idiot!'

'With a herd of three cows it doesn't take long for inventory, does it, Dad?'

'Well, Dad, it's 2:00 AM and we've been messing with her all night...'

"I didn't mean to trample him. How do you say 'my bad' in human?"

'What's that smell?'

"The summer people are coming! The summer people are coming!"

"I'm tired of having to apologize for the condition of the house."

'I've been experiencing a lot of deja moo.'

'Orchestra Pit Bull.'

Three ducks: two have normal bills, third one has bill turned around like bill of cap.

"Dad...how do you know when to stop?"

"We need less cowbell!"

'How the heck is anyone supposed to lay with all this chitchat going on?'

'First of all, I want you to know that my door is always open...'

'No. I insist. You first.'