Bargain Meal Seeker Gifts

"Ten Dollars?! I can't eat that." Bob was on a strict low-cost diet.

"It looks like our house got sick and threw up the attic."

Sale on the same stuff as last week.

'What do you do with the time you save?'

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

Cut Price

"They're on special offer so I got three times more than I could ever use for twice as much as I could afford!"

'That's what I thought, finances are tight: She's switched to no-name cat food...'

Shop struggles to sell books about recession: '90 per cent off on all credit crunch books' (Titles incluude: Beat the Crunch! Who's to Blame? We're all Doomed!)

"Wait a sec, I have a coupon around here somewhere."

'It's nothing serious. Rest is the best cure for binge shopping.'

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

Hamlet's struggle with online shopping addiction. To eBay or not to eBay.

"It's a 'Black eye friday'. I got it in a fight over a 56 inch TV."

When Tia Carmen says... "I got it for a very good price!" it means...she stopped at a garage sale on the way home.

'My wife is going to kill me. All her shopping coupons are in that lost luggage.'

"Sure, shopping online is faster and cheaper, but there's something almost sensuous about carrying an armload of packages!"

'What did I tell you? There's always a catch to those bargain internet travel fares...'

Stuff: You Don't Really Need But Still Don't Have.

Coming Soon! More Stuff You Could Live Without!

"I just..."

'Rozlyn, that blouse is very cute! I think you should get it.'

"Mommy usually reads me a story, then slips me a twenty."

'I love shopping for clothing I don't need with money I don't have.'

"It's the only way I can justify buying so many shoes."

'That'll be four thousand and eighty pounds please'

'We don't know what it is but it was in the sale so we thought we'd better get one before they sold out.'

Excess Baggage: Airlines are constantly working on new seating configurations.

Credit Crunch Corn Flakes.

'Bread, milk, cereal, sugar, sausage, potatoes, beans, biscuits. Click! So easy, but I do miss the sexy till lady.'

'And I want that end table for $40...' When bargain hunters crack.

Greatest hits, Greatest Misses.

"This is what happens when you award the contract to the cheapest tender...."

Orderly Conduct of Sales

"It's not expensive, sir, when you consider it's long smell-by date!"