Bargain House Hunter Gifts

Sign reads - For Sale Still Under A Million.

Homes for sale - some assembly required.

"Enough with how great the public schools are. Just tell us – is there a Trader Joe’s nearby?"

"It looks like our house got sick and threw up the attic."

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

Beach con-man.

'Now that I've lost weight, I can't afford new clothes in my size.'

Sale on the same stuff as last week.

Cut Price

"Freudian, Jungian, Adlerian – none of it compares to retail therapy."

'What do you do with the time you save?'

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

SALE

"They're on special offer so I got three times more than I could ever use for twice as much as I could afford!"

Will work for ETFs

'You can forget the Captain's table-we're not paying that kind of money just to eat with the crew!'

'It's nothing serious. Rest is the best cure for binge shopping.'

"T-shirt weather's coming. How ready are you?"

"Which of these will look the prettiest without the others?"

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

"I'm beginning to think that buy one, get one free is not always a good thing."

"I saved us a hundred bucks on a Jolly Jumper."

"Wait a sec, I have a coupon around here somewhere."

(Visual gag) Wellard's annual BIG HANDBAG SALE!! A woman is dragging a huge bag out from a bag shop

Hamlet's struggle with online shopping addiction. To eBay or not to eBay.

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

'That's what I thought, finances are tight: She's switched to no-name cat food...'

Shop struggles to sell books about recession: '90 per cent off on all credit crunch books' (Titles incluude: Beat the Crunch! Who's to Blame? We're all Doomed!)

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

"It's a 'Black eye friday'. I got it in a fight over a 56 inch TV."

When Tia Carmen says... "I got it for a very good price!" it means...she stopped at a garage sale on the way home.

"How soon will this be a remnant

Countervailing Clichés.

"Sure, shopping online is faster and cheaper, but there's something almost sensuous about carrying an armload of packages!"