Barbarian Humor Enthusiast Pillows

"Well, thanks for inviting us to a wonderful vegan meal and I think we're all agreed I've got to get a cell phone with better reception."

'In its new 'spirit of evenhandedness,' the U. S. Government today sent troops to occupy all foreign countries....'

'OK, team, let's review: when the arrow goes down, it means...?

Trappist Monk Discord

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

'What does it say, Dad?'

"Nous somme desir-eh, go, er, allez, erm, universitaire français, s'il vous plait."

HELLth Food Sprouts

Some scents are nonsense.

'In today's market hyperbole was up sharply. Similes and metaphors held relatively steady with euphemisms hitting another record low.'

"...in other news: Google has been admitted to the United Stations..."

'Staffers don't report we're managing decline. They report we met our targets and did out job!'

Complementary Beverages

"Actually, you do have a racist bone in your body."

"If you get married at the Grammy Awards, can your marriage be annulled at the Country Music Awards?"

'Bront?saurus.'

Clone Factory

Man on left - 'What do you call a public servant who spends half their time doing private work?' Man on right - 'An MP?'

'So far, all I can tell you for sure is how much I've charged you.'

Pokemon Get Lost

"Inactivists"

"Oh, just the usual here, occupying Wall Street."

"The good news is it's brightening up..."

"So who ordered the 'Yo-ho-ho and a bottle of rum on a dead mans chest'?"

'In my opinion, hold out for a doctor.'

"As I understand, we stop refugees making dangerous journeys to a safe countey and offer them safe passage to a dangerous one..."

Trump Tariffs

'Look, half the work is done! All you need to do is fill in the top part so we can legally say the bottom part.'

'We're really just a mom and pop store...if mom and pop had 600,000 employees.'

Vocabulary Glossary for Libya

"It's time we did something about the new Healthy Menu option."

Prescription Drugs '96.

Small Government Is Here

"Facebook VP — you'll be in Circle No. 4."