Bar Hanging Pillows

'Studies show people are more likely to disagree with something than agree with it.'( 'That's not true.')

'We've set the bar quite high at this company. It helps us control bonuses.'

"This place has the best happy hour."

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

"Actually, make that a double cream."

"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

"Our Summer Citrus IPA contains your full daily requirement of fruit and fiber."

5pm Happy Hour. 6pm discussion: what is true happiness?

'No ice.'

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

'No standing while room is in motion.'

"I just realized you're my entire entourage."

"Why am I always the designated driver?!"

'The way I see it, sobriety is a preventable, condition.'

"You know how it is, one minute I'm selling insurance in South Dakota and the next minute I have a hook for a hand. How about you?"

"Buy a man a six-pack, he drinks for a day. Teach him to brew, he drinks all his life."

"I think I speak for my entire generation when I say, 'Yes, I will have another drink.' "

'-and you're living proof that ALL men are not born equal, runt!'

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

"Death Star? Is that in the Valley?"

Bar snacks served in bird-feeders.

"I think we may be related!"

A shop selling "Ice-cold Vodka" in 31 flavors.

"Remember, if I'm ever on life support unplug me... then plug me back in. See if that works."

Dickens & Tolstoy Walk into a Bar: " . . . so, to make a short story long . . . "

'What sort of wines do you like?' ... 'Powerful ones!'

Beers

"Wait, those crunchy, cheesy little fish thingies are free?!"

Dolphin friendly tuna

"An everything Martini, please."

"Why is there so much emphasis put on our stupid race?" "I think people are more interested in it as a metaphor than as an actual race." "Slow and steady wins the race, that sort of thing." "That would explain why I always lose..." "Bartender, another please." "Maybe you should slow down." "You never learn do you?"

Best Before 5th Pint.

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