Bar Frequenters Gifts

"Why only 'bag dog'? You never hear 'bad cat', 'bad horse', 'bad cow'..."

Sal's recent remodeling accommodated his many beer-gut-impaired customers.

"My wife left me. Then my hard drive died."

'Here comes your own personal weekly beer supply, Joe!'

"You want to know why I drink?. . . I drink to forget!"

'Let's go to your place. I cook, I clean and then we can have a meaningful shag.'

'I'm into natural foods, Joe -- give me a martini with a soybean in it.'

His & hers towels.

"On second thoughts, I'll have it stirred, not shaken."

A mini Kebab take-away and a minibar

The Rind of the Ancient Mariner.

"Look! I can almost spot the bar I should be in right now!"

"But, if I don't peel off the entire label, the label wins."

'He thought the fire alarm was the bell for last orders, and ran towards the bar.'

Ostrich Bar

'Of all the fern bars in Encino, she's gotta walk into mine.'

"With other dates I've been on, long walks on the beach seemed like a cliche, but with you it really feels genuine."

Frog and Princess in Bar

Chairs - a bar where everybody has a seat!

"Time! Ladies and gentlemen please, for yet another probe into the brewing industry"

"I'm taking a creative writing class. I turned in my checkbook and got an A."

Our changing neighborhood: new store openings.

"Do they look tired to you?"

"I'm thinking of turning green..."

"What on earth do they find to talk about?"

'C'mon, Larry - you knew the risks when you promised to be my wingman.'

"Is it horny in here, or is it just me?"

"I can see that you're a cultured individual..."

'I'm an economist, but I try not to take myself too seriously.'

"Oh him, that's Ron. He's a permanent fixture in here."

"I'm all over the Internet, so why hide? I might as well come out and enjoy myself."

'Do you know how to make something called 'Casketon the beach?''

'Wow!... Look at the personality on her!'

'I'd like to get in touch with my feminine side, Joe -- bring me a Bloody Mary.'

'If that's my wife, you're not in!...'