Bar Chat Lover Pillows

Barman sends a message from a woman - gives his customer a slap in the face.

"Actually, I'd love to work on Mars, but it's a hell of a commute."

"The in-flight movie was nothing but ads. Then I remembered: I was on a commercial flight."

"Another flue shot, Larry.

'I like you, you've got balls.'

'Democracy? -- do you REALLY want the bars closed every election day?'

"My world is Tribeca, lars, and yours is a different world."

'You can't win - a little knowledge is a dangerous thing, but ignorance is no excuse!'

"It feels like me against the world but it's actually just the state of Connecticut."

'Next time you hear confession from that barmaid say, Tut-tut not COR.'

"It's easy for me. Three beers and I'm in the zone."

'These drinks have been watered down.'

"It's Olive isn't it?"

'Tell me about it, buddy... I completely understand where you're coming from.'

'I've turned another corner in my life.' 'One more corner and you'll be back where you started.'

'Women, can't live with 'em, can't live without em.'

'Yeah, but did you hear the crowd roar when I hooked the cape out of your hands?'

'You're trying to find yourself? -- No offense, but if I were you, I'd look for somebody ELSE.'

"If that's the chief medical officer I'm not here."

"Let's have some fun, guys -- Let's walk into a bar."

'Single or double?'

'Here's the secret to a profitable 99-cent pint night - 14 ounces of foam, 2 ounces of beer.'

"Yeah, I'm selling my bowling balls. Free delivery to anyone who lives downhill."

'I'm having trouble with drinking. . . I'm getting Arthritis in my elbow.'

BEER BELLY

'I don't let her have her way... she does it without my permission!'

'What I've just has my teeth whitened,'

'I was given a ton of great career advice when I graduated from college. Unfortunately, I can't remember any of it because my entire brain is filled with passwords and PIN numbers.'

"And another thing. When they start telling you 'You've still got it,' you don't."

What's grey, has four legs and a trunk?

"It was sort of an after-the-bell transaction."

"...And then I forgot where I put my memory stick!"

'Really? A Great Ape? I'm a Great Dane myself...'

I'm used to seeing crocodile tears when I tell off a man in this bar, but this is the first time I've seen crocodile exclamation points. ! !

'Nothing from the Nobel Committee or the National Endowment for the Arts, but 'Joe' wants you to write some napkins for his bar.'