Banking Industry Commentator Gifts

'Would you believe that I lost my job just because the banking regulatory authority said that I'm too greedy??!'

"DeepSeek" "Stargate"

The Shrinking Dollar.

You can breed these if the environment is right.

'It says our line printer is obsolete our remote terminal is obsolete, and I'm afraid, we're obsolete.'

'Enter His Royal Globalness...'

'Next on 'evening shouting match'...is it a bull or bear market?'

"Old economy, new economy - some things never change."

"Since when did economists become sociologists?!"

'It's a demonstration by retired CEOs who refuse to give up their bonuses.'

Cold drinks, candy and corporate buyouts.

"We're going to have a post-flood economy to deal with."

Rebuilding the Economy.

Banker stepping into 'New image' in 'Savings and Loans' office

'I like the jib of their cuts.'

"Brodkin, now that the economy is creating jobs at a faster than expected clip, why don't you go out and find yourself one?"

This next piece is entitled "Concerto No. 2 in C Minor Blues." Sign the economy's hurting everyone.

Bureau of Inflation.

Bank Robbery Statistics

"We can't all work for Goldman Sachs."

"You have reached our 800 number. . . . If you are a preferred account, please dial B-I-G-S-H-O-T now. . . . If you are an ordinary account, dial J-O-E-B-L-O-W now. . . . If you have a service complaint, dial G-E-T-L-O-S-T now."

Vote GOP: 'Lowering taxes for the rich creates jobs, in the huge demand for security guards!'

When Governments Bail Out the Sub-Prime Banks.

'Crisis? Which crisis?'

Austerity Egg Hunt.

"Unfortunately, Whitcomb, I am suffering from compassion fatigue."

J. P. Morgan whale harpooned by bank regulators.

'I say this is the best we've been given for a long time!'

"The filthy rich"

'Today stocks dropped on news that the only thing to fear is everything.'

'You're a bad credit risk so, yes, of course you can have some money.'

'I've put the business up for sale.'

'One might say the market's gone from the sub-prime to the iniquitous!'

'And in further economic news, the silver lining in the latest economic crisies has been downgraded to bronze.'

'I'm sorry, but without a significant deposit, we can't give you a mortgage.'