Banking Banter Appreciator Prints

'And on the eighth day, God had a piece of clay left over. . . so he made a banker and. . .'

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

"Sorry, but you're a loan risk."

"Before we discuss your loan, Mr Carlson, perhaps you'd like to spend a few moments with out bank chaplain."

Banker stepping into 'New image' in 'Savings and Loans' office

'Give Me All The Money In My Account'

'I need a loan or a bailout so I can evolve,'

Secret Identity Theft.

Screw up Assange's finances and I'm closing my accounts.

'I'd like to apply for a job as a predatory lender.'

'Contract? No contract. We do all our business with nothing more than a handshake.'

"There's a $2.00 service fee for that friendly greeting."

'There's a five dollar discrepancy in my bank balance. Would you mind if I counted the money?'

'If you're opening a joint account, Dr. Jekyll, the other account holder has to be here to sign.'

'I suppose a loan to send them to summer camp could be called a home improvement loan.'

Harvest Data Festival

'Sorry. We've had to close your 'chicken' account ma'am. Everything you write bounces.'

'A rogue nation robbed the World Bank!'

'You hold no authority that will allow you passage, and are ignorant of the magic password ... can you at LEAST tell me your mother's maiden name?'

Cashier for Decoration Purposes Only

"The Good Lord is an excellent reference, but without a phone number..."

"Hands up!"

'I'm afraid you'll have to get this hold-up note initialled at our withdrawals counter.'

"And do you have any other form of security against a loan other than this 'Good times are coming' horoscope?"

PANIC!

'You built this with our venture capital. Now we would like our 60%.'

'Sir, the drive-thru window is on the other side of the building.'

Bank loan applicant

'What's your not-quite-so prime rate?'

'Oh no! They've turned my internet bank into a bar...'

"Collateral? How about I teach you what ties to avoid?"

'Sorry, we don't make loans.'

"Once upon a time there was a kind old bank that did not charge its customers a fee."

'Whenever I want to be dominated, I visit my bank manager...'

'I need to borrow enough to get myself out of debt.'