Bank Bailout Buff Gifts

'You realize we'd be unemployed it it wasn't for the bank bailout.'

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

Mario Draghi

Squirrel putting nuts in a safe box.

'The bank says they're freezing my assets! I don't understand: They've always been frozen...'

'Oh, no! It's all in euros!'

Bank cashier sits near sign: 'Please do not ask for credit, as refusal often offends'.

'...and this time Gerald, don't refer to the RBS as the Ripoff Bonus Scheme!'

"I don't like the look of this."

"Nice work on that German contract. You've made your mark, Ashworth."

"Don't worry! He's totally changed..."

"We do have faith but I'm afraid our policy is still not to accept Bitcoin."

Spanish bank needs propping up.

'I love it when you talk big bucks, Mr. Williams.'

"Pendleton will stay afloat no matter what!"

"I said freeze, punk, I didn't mean literally!"

'Bob was eventually arrested and charged with outsider trading.'

'Credit being what it is, I'm sure you won't mind if we see your 200,000 cattle first...'

Obama's Financial Reform Pill: I hope they won't need a glass of water.

"I'm worried. We're small enough to fail, but not big enough to be bailed out!"

World-Wide Bank: Economic crisis lands in the in-tray.

Saving Spain

Big Loan, Little Deposit Bank

"Squawk! Interest rates are going negative!"

"I've brought companies back from the brink of disaster before Phil, but to bring one back from the dead? I'm still patting myself on the back over that one!"

Offshore tax havens.

The truth about the death of the Dinosaurs.

'Wouldn't it be easier if the banks simply merged with the Inland Revenue?'

'What a wonderful day to declare chapter 13!'

"How much do I need? How much you got?"

'So glad we ticked the no publicity box.'

Bank. Moving Co. Joe got an apartment above the bank. He moved his things in today. Now he can say his "assets are over ten million dollars"!

"Good morning - I'm from your bank. We'd like our house back please!"

"I'm afraid with your income I couldn't possibly approve a loan of that size. Would you like a list of our approved loan sharks?"

Deposits insured by the U.S. Government (which has a $4.2 trillion debt).