Baldness Philosophers T-Shirts

The three stages of baldness

"Stop the drama. Take that wig off and wait 'till spring like everyone else."

Woman looking into a mirror

"Define fair."

Snail Pattern Balding.

Mail Pattern Baldness - A man with a bald patch in the form of a mailing envelope.

The barber

Balding gnomes

'Hey, look. This anti hair loss treatment is finally working. My hair's stopped falling out!'

This is what Fred gets for wishing for more hair.

Bald man with a brush on his head

'It's a smaller planet than I thought.'

Your male pattern baldness is partly genetic and partly hereditary.

'I wish I had more hair.' 'Don't be a silly billy. You've got plenty of hair. Here's your bald, I mean your boiled, egg.'

All I know is, your Rogaine's all chewed up, and the cat's been coughing like crazy.

There's a zip code on your head. It's mail pattern baldness.

"He's a good boy, but he sheds like crazy."

'Global warming, international terrorism, melting polar ice caps, receding hairline... It's all very worrying.'

The less celebrated, but still spectacular, combover eagle.

'Blummin' 'eck - a granddad!'

Bald hairdresser recomending hair restoring lotion

"We took a yachting holiday last year, strayed into the Bermuda Triangle, miraculously made it home somehow, but Brian's hair disappeared."

"Good news, we found a plant the cured baldness."

"Yeah, I agree, it is a but unexpected since you were such a handsome caterpillar..."

"The hair on my back - will it go back to my head?"

'I was born as beautiful as you, but after a few years you will see...'

"Someday, son, all of yours will be this."

'The only thing that stops hair falling is the floor.'

"Hey - a crop circle! Let's land here...."

"Operator, get me my hair!"

Half full head of hair, half empty head of hair.

'I'm prescribing Rogaine for your head and Roloss for your back.'

"Of course there's no medical cure for baldness!"

'Your mother reckons you look like your baby photos now without your dandruff, dear.'

"I was once a very beautiful woman, but forty years of reading the 'Times' has taken its toll."