Bald Appreciation Society Gifts

"Mind your language, Peters - I'm a 'follicly-challenged' old bastard, if you please."

"Geez. He's bald. No teeth. And craps in diapers."

'Wow, talk about shedding!'

'We were thinking of naming him after his daddy, but I don't really like the name, Old slap head.'

"Oh, quit your whining. At least yours comes back in the Spring

"They say eventually I'll start to look like him."

"When I said hair transplant I meant more than one."

Balding Autumn Tree.

A bald eagle approaches middle age

"I don't regret going bald. I just regret growing bald before I had a chance to rock a man bun."

Bald hairdresser recomending hair restoring lotion

"All in favor of toupees, say aye."

'Well, if you must run your fingers through my hair.'

"Hey - a crop circle! Let's land here...."

I shaved my head before clipping season so the sheep feel we're in this together. Shear and shear alike!

"Uh oh, Chet. There's a toupee down on the play.."

'I think you're on to something, Langdon. Perhaps we should try for a lot of LITTLE hairs instead.'

"So, under 'Hair Color' you wrote 'Infra-Redhead!?!"

'The bad news is, it didn't grow hair. The good news is, he's being featured in 'Better Homes and Gardens'.' (Quick Gro tub next to chair.)

Money and hair only seem important when you don't have any!

'POSTED! TOPLESS BATHERS ONLY BEYOND THIS POINT!'

'Don't you guys ever read? That contract is void in case of male pattern baldness!'

"When I was young, we had a lot of hair and no tattoos. Now everything's all reversed."

The Bald Eagle and its evolutionary ancestors.

"You have no idea how embarrassing it is to be a bald lion. This morning a cub mistook me for his mother."

'The truly enlightened don't NEED comb-overs!'

Child commenting on a visitor's baldness

A halo lifts a toupee off an angel.

"Bob, are you going to wear that star all the time?" "It covers my bald spot."

'Nice try, Herb.'

'Do you think that's a rug he's wearing?'

'Your bald head is like Alaska. A great white bear place.'

"Write down that my hair didn't grow back!"

'No, I'm not bald - I'm shaved...There is a difference.'

'I felt that!'