Balanced Lifestyle Seeker T-Shirts

'I invest globally, but eat foods grown locally - so that gives my life balance.'

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

'So Kyle - have you considered the challenges of van driving?'

'Half an optimist is an odd bird, Sarah.'

'My wife's on a diet. So far she's lost her personality.'

Hello-BUNS OF STEEL?

'Eat a balanced diet, walk daily and make prudent investments.'

'Bad news! More people are switching from red meat to fish!'

"It's a new take on the whole work/life balance thing. . . Anybody who has a life needs to be given more work."

"I enjoy eating healthy – I just don’t like the food."

'Isn't it romantic, being married in the same alley where we first met eight months ago?'

'It says, 'If you want more fiber, eat the package.'

"I got a chocolate bar and gum!" "What the #!@* is 'CBD oil'?!"

Academy.

Books or Junk Food.

'Don't worry. His diet's only last a day or two.'

"Don't you just want to stop and eat the flowers sometimes?"

'What you need is some negative growth.'

'I found enlightenement, and I still pull down my $250,000 per. What more can I ask?'

"I'm burning my little black dresses and moving upstate."

Low fat diets.

'Do you want a fright with that?'

'Eat less. Drink less. Be merry more.'

"Does skipping breakfast count as both exercise and dieting?"

"Why don't you lose weight?"

"Will the four main food groups fit on a pizza?"

'Okay, mine says, 'Eat healthier foods. The current health care system really sucks.''

'I'm really not eating a balanced diet. I'm always replacing meals with snacks. Maybe I should be taking a multivitamin before I eat a donut.'

'This is why they call them 'rolls'.'

'I'm on this 3 month diet...it only lasts a week, but it feels like 3 months.'

'Hold on. You're my personal trainer? Look, I signed out for a work out, not a pig out.'

"Yes, your blood work is not good! Going after the weak, sick or old is not conducive to eating well now, is it?"

Nutrition Note: As a result of eating more sensibly, the wee folks are no 3/8 inch less wee than they were a generation ago.

Candies and diet pills

"OK, I admit it. I smoke, drink and eat too much, don't exercise enough ..."